I met up with some other wives and moms this morning and each one just talked about their love story. It’s still February, so I guess you can still say that we did this as part of the celebration of the love month. Anyway, listening to these women tell their love stories was so amusing because you can see their eyes begin to sparkle, and their faces begin to glow as their smiles get wider and wider from the wonderful memories.

These were some of the things I was reminded of as we listened and laughed at our stories:

1. I should pray that we would never lose that sparkle and glow when it comes to our marriages and each time we talk about our marriages.

2. Though memories of the past are good things to hold on to, we should not just live on the glory of those past memories. Each day is an opportunity to create new ones.

3. We should try to always remember the things that attracted us to our spouses in the first place. As we become more and more familiar with each other, it becomes easier and easier to just notice the things that fall short of our standards or that irritate us. What it this way when we were still in courtship?

4. So much of what attracted me to my husband wasn’t just the physical traits, but more of how his heart was more passionate for God  more than anything else. This is a good thing, because physical attraction would never be enough to sustain a marriage. Sooner or later, all the physical traits that attracted us to our spouses will change and fade away; what will remain and improve as time goes by is his heart for God, and his character that gets developed as he grows in his relationship with God. I have to pray that  my husband’s heart will always be passionate for God above all.

5. Our love story doesn’t end once we say our “I do’s” at the altar. We have to be deliberate in building on our love story until death do us part.

Before I move on with blog life, let me just conclude this series on my thoughts during prayer and fasting with this post (Betcha didn’t know there was a “series” huh?? –I didn’t either! hehe ). A bit late, I know. But I still think I should post it anyway.

There are so many verses on faith and prayer in the Bible. If there’s one theme that stood out for me this week,though, it is that of coming to God like a child. 

What does this look like for us?

To come like a child is to:

1. Come Asking boldly.

If you have kids, you would know exactly what I am talking about when I say that kids have no clue what they are asking for sometimes! For example, they would always tell me, “Let’s go to America tomorrow! I want to see my cousins there!”  as if it were that easy. To them, going to Disneyworld is just like going to the mall. Distance is not an issue. Money is not an issue. Time is not an issue. If they want something, they blurt it out and ask us for it— without hesitation.

I wonder why we don’t do the same, even if it is God himself inviting us to just ask anything in His name??

“Yes, ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it!” John 14:14

2. Come with an Expectant Heart.

When kids ask you for something and you say yes, to them it is as good as done. They go on with the rest of their day assured and carefree, knowing that their requests will be granted. Even without written contracts, a single “yes” from you is as good as a deal that is signed, sealed, and delivered.

What about us? Do we come to God with the same kind of expectation and peace?

“For all of God’s promises have been fulfilled in Christ with a resounding “Yes!” And through Christ, our “Amen” (which means “Yes”) ascends to God for his glory.” 2 Corinthians 1:20

3. Come and Play.

What is one thing that a child never gets tired of? ….Playing, of course! No matter how late it is, as long as you don’t tell them to stop, they would find it in themselves to muster up enough energy to keep on playing. As long as they are at it,  they don’t get bored, they don’t complain (there are occasional fights, yes…that comes with the territory, but that’s another topic altogether), and they are full of joy. Why? Because they are kids! That’s how God wired them, and as long as they are playing, they are being themselves. They don’t have to tidy themselves up to play. There’s no need to concern themselves with “grown-up” issues. They can let their imaginations run free.

God has wired our spirits to pray. Prayer should not be something that bores us, for it is meant to give us joy and to energize us! When we pray, we too, can and should be ourselves. We don’t have to tidy ourselves up before coming to God. We don’t have to concern ourselves with things too overwhelming for us to understand. We don’t need a certain structure in order to pray. We can come and be ourselves for as long as we want.

Do we enjoy our praying time as much as children enjoy their playing time?

“I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.” Mark 10:15

Ever since I had kids, this has been a common scenario in my life:  Just as I finally get some time alone to do some things that require a certain level peace and quiet, one of the girls come running to ask me for something. It may be something as trivial as a hair clip to something that is a matter of life and death– for them, anyway. Either way, I noticed that our kids do not really have a good sense of timing. They just come whenever they feel like it, for whatever matter they  feel like discussing. They don’t stop to think about how to say things or how to express themselves properly. They don’t stop to think about how they look. There’s no need to put up a front. They come to you when they are sad and when they want to cry as if it’s the end of the world. They come to you when they are happy and overly-excited that it seems as though the whole floor has turned into one giant trampoline. They come to you when something scares them. They come to you when something bothers them. Often times, they even have a hard time articulating themselves properly. They often get their thoughts all jumbled up as they try to translate what’s going on in their heads into words.

Still— you, as a parent who loves them dearly,   listen anyway. Never mind that you were set on finishing that project for the house. Never mind that you were set on doing something else. You stop and listen anyway. It is a joy to see them come running to you. You don’t even notice the messy hair or the runny nose (well, you do, but you listen first and take care of that later). You don’t even notice the fact that sometimes they don’t make sense. You feel what they feel.  You’re the first to rejoice with them when they’re happy. You become sad when you see them crying. You would do anything to comfort them and make them feel safe and secure. You would do all those things because you love them. They are your children.

And they know it.

Our children know that they have complete access to us. They know they can come to you anytime and you would stop and listen to them. (Well, that’s the ideal response. We are but humans who fall short, after all). They know that by virtue of them being your children, they are granted that privilege of barging in (in a better sense of the word).

Sometimes though, our children grow up forgetting they have unlimited access. All of a sudden, they  have to wait for “perfect timing” to ask for their allowance or something they really like or to be allowed to go over their friend’s house. Before the weekend of the party arrives, they stock up on points by being extra nice– helping out with chores and studying really hard– to increase the chances of their requests being granted. A lot of teenagers grow up suddenly forgetting that they can come talk to their parents about anything and everything. They filter out what they think their parents would consider as “bad” stuff and share only the good. Instead of acting like children–members of the family, they begin behaving like boarders who just happen to stay and be  under the care of their parents.

When we started out in our walk with God, realizing what Jesus has done for us and that through Him we have been made children of God, there was no limit to our asking. We would be so excited to tell God everything– every desire, every disappointment, every detail of our lives.

Then we “grow older”. We forget about this unlimited access and we try once again to “earn” God’s favor by stocking up on points. We start editing what we say, as if He doesn’t see and know everything. We act as if there’s only a certain time when we can come talk to Him.

It’s my prayer that we would never grow old when it comes to our faith in God. I pray that we will always be like little children and know that we can come to God anytime, anywhere–  no matter how messy we look or how inconvenient the timing seems to be, or how difficult it is for us to articulate ourselves. I pray that we will always remember that by virtue of us being children of God (through the cross of Christ), we now have complete access to God, and we have the awesome privilege of barging in anytime, anywhere.

…And our Heavenly Father, our perfect Father whose ways and thoughts are far beyond our own (and who is beyond our capacity to disturb and interrupt)— is more than willing to listen.

…And yes, He is going to wipe off the tears and the runny nose, too.  :)

“Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Hebrews 4:16

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)

When Jesus made this invitation for us to come, it was with the premise that most probably, His people would be weary. He knew that the greater percentage of us who would be needing this invitation had a profile of this kind: tired, confused, weary, burdened. If He had expected otherwise, He would have given us this invitation instead: “Come to me, all you who have got it all figured out in life, and I will give you rest.”

But no. He didn’t say that.  He has extended his welcome for those who realize that they do not have it all figured out. He has long been inviting those who acknowledge that this life has left them tired, sometimes confused, and most probably overwhelmed.

This loving Jesus— God the Son who saw it fit to walk through this earth, had actually lived long enough in this world to know every possible temptation and burden we might face. This loving Jesus— God the Son who counted it a joy to give His life for us, actually knows –I mean, really knows– what it is like to live life in this fallen world. This loving Jesus— God the Son who is now reigning on His throne in heaven is telling us, inviting us, welcoming us….to come. No need to figure it out just yet…just come.

And that’s not the end of it.  Here’s the promise: I will give you rest.

Rest for our minds, rest for our bodies, rest for our hearts, rest for our spirits….REST.

Peace… joy… security… REST.

“Therefore, since the promise of entering his rest still stands, let us be careful that none of you be found to have fallen short of it.” Hebrews 4:1

I encourage you, come enter His rest today.

Also….drink lots of water!

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photo: crossmap.com

Over our “last supper” earlier, Dennis asked me what I had listed down as my faith goals for this year. If you’ve been joining us for the past few years of prayer and fasting, then you’ve probably been making this list, too. If you have no idea what I am talking about, let me explain as briefly as I could…

Every start of the year, our church calls on everyone (whoever wants to join) to go on a seven-day prayer and fasting. This is the time when we consecrate ourselves to God corporately, and together we believe God for breakthroughs in every area of our lives. In line with this, we usually make a list of the many things we are believing God for– be it in the area of ministry, family, health, finances, etc. We call this our “faith goals“. This list is usually an acknowledgement that “with man, it is impossible; But with God, all things are possible!”.

I hope I didn’t confuse you even more with that explanation, but let me move on and get back to my point…

Over dinner, Dennis and I began to wonder how it must have been like when people of the Bible fasted. Did they have a set of lists, too? Or did they just come with expectant hearts, ready to ask God boldly, yet also willing to surrender to whatever God said– completely?

For the past years, I’ve diligently listed down my faith goals. It’s always been an extensive list of the many things I am believing God for, broken into categories to make sure I don’t miss out any detail nor any area of my life. That’s just my O.C. self, and it’s been working well. It was always the case that just before the fast, God would impress upon my heart the “theme” he had for me for that particular year. (Last year, for example, it was Joshua. “Be strong and courageous.”– I had no doubt that was God’s charge for me. True enough, that was the word I needed to hold on to last year!).  That’s how it’s been almost every year.

This year, however, is a bit different. I haven’t come up with a list yet, and I feel that God wants me to come with a blank list.

He wants me to come EMPTY. 

He wants to be the one to make the list. Instead of coming to God with a set of things I want to ask Him for this year, He just wants me to just come to Him, period. He wants me to come to Him– completely surrendered and ready to take His marching orders. He wants me to come to Him– to seek Him, to be fully satisfied with Him.

“The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.”

From there I have no doubt I will still end up with a list after the fast– but this time it will not be a list of what I want to ask Him for, but a list of His desires made my own. It will be a list of His plans revealed for me to obey. It will be a list of His promises for me to just walk into. Breakthrough will be inevitable then, and just like the Psalmist says…

“SURELY, goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life.”

Enjoy your water everyone!  

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photo: blurredhistory.blogspot.com

Found this post again among the files I managed to “salvage” back when my site’s host failed me. This one’s dated June 19, 2009, but I still think it serves as a good reminder for me.

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We just came home from our good friends’ bridal shower and stag party (same house, different rooms for the men and women). I have to hand it to Steph’s (the soon-to-be bride) siblings…you all did a great job organizing it! The theme was anything kitchen, which I loved since all the prizes were useful. Had I known, I would have participated more than I have instead of just eating during the first few games!

** fast forward**

The last activity was for the married couples to give tips on “How to have a happy marriage”. This is what I came up with in the few minutes given to us:

H- Have a clear vision for your marriage. How do you want your marriage to look and be like?

A- Appreciate more than criticize. The latter is easier to do, but the former feels better and actually  yields much more results.

P- Pray together. I acknowledge that apart from the grace of God and complete reliance on Him, I probably will be more prone to doing everything else contrary to what the Bible teaches us on having great marriages.

P- Pay attention to each other’s needs and desires. “Pay attention” being the key word here. “To Each other”, too.

I- Inspire your partner to dream big. You have the wonderful privilege of being your spouse’s number one fan; being the president of his/her fan club— with front row seats and VIP passes to all the great things that he/she will be doing!

….You also have the power to crush all those dreams— in which case, you both end up just watching from the bleachers.

N- Never stop trying out new things. Having a routine and having responsibilities don’t have to be boring. It’s really up to both of you.

E- Enjoy sex.  (this one, ONLY when you’re ALREADY married!) ….No explanations needed.

S- Serve each other. You are in that marriage to serve and build up….not the other way around.

S- Savor every moment, even those that seem insignificant. Marriage is one exciting union! Every moment together is a blessing and is made to be a joy. Don’t just let those moments pass you by (parang Kodak lang yan…)

If any of you have other tips, feel free to write them!   I love learning from all of you!

PS: Mika’s on her way to recovery. She’s starting to eat again! yipee! ...(**Aah….so Mika was sick last June 2009, eh? Well, she’s been one healthy little girl since last year! )

**edit:

PPS: May I add? Can we change the spelling of “happiness” by adding one more -s at the end???

S- Say sorry. A lot of times, this is more powerful than the words “I love you”.  :)

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photo: theminimalists.com