You know how they say that every moment is a teachable moment? Whether we are at home playing or eating, or out caught in traffic, there is always an opportunity to teach our little ones.

I’ve embraced that “truth”. I admit I have a tendency to over-explain things (meaning, explain even trivial matters), but I do try to be as concise as I can possibly be as I do this.

With Alyanna, it seems that my efforts in explaining are never in vain. I can always see that she understands what I try to tell her, and she is even able to explain or challenge other people’s opinions and actions based on what she has come to understand as truth or what’s right.

Mika, on the other hand, well…. she’s Mika…..

CORRECTION/TEACHABLE MOMENT NUMBER ONE:

(While teaching her to honor and respect others with her words)

ME: “Mika, you have to be very careful with your words. You know your tongue is like a sword, it is so powerful….”

MIKA: *interrupts and beams as she has a light bulb moment* “Lite a swort but with teeth and a mouth??”

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TEACHABLE MOMENT NUMBER TWO:

(Out of the blue, while eating)

MIKA: “You know, diba mom Jesus died for us on the tross (cross)?   Hala. That’s why we need another Jesus na. Let’s  find another Jesus.”

(Uhm, anak, idolatry ata tawag dun!)

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CORRECTION/TEACHABLE MOMENT NUMBER THREE:

(While trying to settle a dispute between the two girls)

MIKA: (trying to defend herself and explain what had happened) “No I didn’t do any-tin to huh but she keets sayin that I did any-tin to huh! (I didn’t do anything to her but she keeps saying that I did….I think she meant ‘something’… to her)

ME: “So who’s lying and who’s telling the truth?”

MIKA: “I’m not lyin’! Achie’s lyin!’”

ME: “Mika, you know the Bible tells us to keep our tongue from evil and our lips from speaking lies. Lying is a sin. Do you know that?”

MIKA: “Yes.”

ME: “Do you know what lying means?”

MIKA: “Yes.”

ME: “What does it mean?”

MIKA: “Not obeyin’ you?”

ME: “Mika, lying is when we are not telling the truth; when we are not telling what really happened only and when we make up our own story. SO are you making up your own story or are you telling me the truth?”

MIKA: “ Telling you the truth.”

ME: “Are you telling me the truth or making up your own story?”

MIKA: “Making up my own story.”

Hmm…Oh no. I know where this is going……nowhere.

Like I said, she’s Mika.

Each time I begin to think that Mika is finally getting something I am teaching her, she makes sure to let me know otherwise.  A lot of times, I have to ask for discernment to know whether it’s innocence, ignorance, or rebellion disguised in cute’s clothing. Still, I do not stop planting seeds of God’s Word because I just never know when it will finally click and she would finally get it.

After all, the clicking part is not really our job anymore. We can plant the seeds, but we can’t force the growth out of them. All we can do is be faithful in planting and cultivating, guiding and praying…..and wait for God’s Word to grow in their hearts and  bear much fruit.

Earlier this morning, I woke up with a very itchy sting in my eye. Over breakfast, Alyanna complained that she too, had an “ouchie” in her eye . I simply told her, “Yeah. Me too. Maybe a bug bit us or some dirt entered our eyes.”

I then went back to finishing my cup of coffee while I enjoyed the remaining minutes of my supposedly-quiet reading time.

Several minutes after the girls finished their breakfast, Alyanna came running to ask me, “Mom! Is the ouchie in your eye gone already??” I said no. It was still very itchy. Alyanna then proudly told me that her ouchie was gone.

“You know why, mom??”

Of course, we all know that the only way to answer that kind of question is with one word– “Why??”

She confidently replied, “Because I prayed for God to heal me!”

Oh my. How embarrassing! Honestly, I didn’t even think of that option! The thought of asking God to remove something as petty as an itchy bite on the eye didn’t even occur to me! Maybe subconsciously I didn’t want to “bother” God with this very trivial concern, or maybe I was ashamed to ask for something that all the people in hospitals would just laugh at….I don’t know. But, oh my….I can’t believe I did not think of praying for this tiny little ouchie on my eye!

Of course, I had to commend my five year-old for what she did, and acknowledge my…..”forgetfulness”, so I did.

“Wow, Alyanna! Good thinking! I’m so happy you thought of that! You know, you’re right! What a great idea! Why didn’t I think of doing that right away??? That’s what I should have done, too!”

“Yeah, mom. That’s what I do every time I have a problem. I just pray to God by myself, even if it’s just in my mind. That’s what you should do, too, mom.”

Okay, okay….I stand corrected….and reminded.

If we can believe God for the big things, why can’t we believe God for the small ones? If we can trust God with our future, why do we sometimes forget to trust him with our present daily concerns? If we can take God for His Word when He says that He even knows the number of hair on our heads, what makes us think that He’s any less concerned with the trivial things we face each day?

Our God is not just someone who’s way “up there” overseeing the affairs of mankind. Yes, He is above all. But He is also in all….and is very much involved and interested in each of our lives.

“When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers,
   the moon and the stars, which you have set in place,
what is man that you are mindful of him,
   and the son of man that you care for him?” -Psalm 8:3-4

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photo: www.gotit.co

Alyanna barged into our room earlier this morning, telling me she had something very important to ask me. Of course, I put aside everything that I was doing and prepared myself to answer her very important  question.

ALYANNA: “Mom, even if Mika and I disobey you, you still love us just the same?”

ME: “Of course!”

ALYANNA: “”Even if we disrespect and sin sometimes, you still love us a lot??”

ME: “Yes, of course!”

ALYANNA: “You love us just the same??? Still a lot?? It won’t change?? It won’t become less??”

ME: “Yes, nga…why are you asking?” (Is this a trap?? Are they prepping me? Is she about to tell me she did something terrible?)

ALYANNA: “Nothing. I’m just asking because you keep telling us that you love us. That’s what you keep saying to me and Mike all the time— that you love us…. that even if we disobey, you love us. How come??”

ME: “Aahh…because you know, I myself have received and experienced God’s unconditional love.”

ALYANNA: (as expected) “Huh???? What does that mean??”

ME: “It means that even before pa, when I didn’t love God yet, He already loved me. Even if sometimes I disobey Him, He still loves me….so that same love that God gives me, that teaches me and enables me to love you also— even if sometimes you don’t obey me. Because of Jesus, God loves us whether or not we are nice or even when we sin, so now we are also able to love others the same way. We love others even if they do not do what we want sometimes. Do you understand?”

ALYANNA: “Ah, so….when I become a mommy na, I should love my babies the way you love us?”

ME: “Well, yes…but even if you’re not a mommy yet (secret thought: And please! Let it be a looooong time before you become one!!)….you can actually practice loving this way— with Mika, with us, with your friends… Sometimes we all do something that you don’t like, right? Or like when Mika fights you? Then that’s a perfect time to practice asking God to help you love her even if you don’t want to.”

*Mika then entered the room, crying that she got a boo-boo….ending the conversation* I’m guessing Alyanna breathed a sigh of relief here.

I’m sure that at the back of every child’s mind, there is that longing to be assured of our love and acceptance. We have to make sure that even as we discipline and correct them for their misbehavior and wrong attitudes, we communicate that they are loved and accepted, not on the basis of their performance. We want to communicate that the premise of our love for them is not even our  capacity to love, because even that is unstable as long as we called humans. Rather, we love because we understand that God’s love enables us to love others as well, even if we don’t really feel like it.

Thank you Lord, for loving me, even if more often than not, I am not so lovable. A lot of times, I am selfish and I disobey. Yet even then, you love me; You see Christ’s righteousness in me. I pray that you will help me to love my spouse, love my kids, love everyone around me with this same love that I have received. Help me to see them the way you do. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Enjoy the rest of the week!

I’ve had this very irritating cough for a week now. I think it started because of the weird weather change– having typhoons in the middle of the summer heat. My throat would get so dry and extremely sore because of all the coughing. Hassle.

Anyway, that’s not really what I wanted to share. I actually want to express how deeply touched I am by Alyanna (my eldest), and how she has been this whole week. <3 <3 <3

You see, I haven’t been able to read books to them for the past few days because of my throat. Since then, she took the role of being the storyteller and volunteered to read short stories to her sister. Of course, her pace is still slow, but she really tries her best! She reminds me of Dory of Finding Nemo, when she was talking “Whale” (an exaggeration of course!…she might be able to read this and get offended! hehe). Also, on two occasions when I was really down because of the stinging pain from all the coughing, she came into the room with a bottle of cough syrup for me to take. Mika was tagging along because apparently, she has been appointed by her older sister to be the “cupbearer”, so mommy could drink more water.

Everyday she has been praying for me, too. She would lay her hands on my throat and pray the most sincere prayer: “Jesus, please? Please? Please? Can you please heal mommy and take away her cough na? Please? Please? Now na? Today can you heal her na please? Thank you Jesus.” And a few minutes after praying she would ask to check whether or not I still had cough.

I know everything I just shared is nothing, really. Mababaw, so to speak. But if you know Alyanna, you’d know where I’m coming from. She’s not really the caring and affectionate type, but I can see that lately she’s been stepping up and becoming more compassionate and expressively sweet, much to my delight.

This afternoon when she came home from Kids’ Church, she asked me,  ”Mom, you check. Do you still have cough or Jesus healed you na?”. I asked her why she wanted to know (I thought she wanted me to read books to her already), and she told me that she wanted to check because they had just prayed for me in Kids’ Church. Again, I was extremely touched that I could not help but turn all mushy and I told her how grateful I was for all her prayers for the past week, and how I’m sure God has healed me already (my cough really has decreased by 89.7%! ). As I kept saying “Alyanna, thank you ha? Thank you so much for always praying for me to get healed. I really appreciate it!“, she replied to me in a very matter-of-fact tone— “Yeah! We should just pray because that’s a lot better diba? It’s better than taking medicines and going to the doctor pa diba? We should just ask God, because…He’s GOD!”

(Amen!)

I love how kids make things plain and simple. Just ask…and keep on asking God, because….He’s God!  I love how our children can be so confident when they ask God for something. I love how even if they know they’ve been praying the same prayers, they can still keep on praying and asking with equal amount of hope and faith. I am reminded of Abraham, who did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised. (Romans 4:20,21).

Lord, I pray that You will give me this kind of faith— consistent, unwavering, fully persuaded. I pray that you will give me this kind of faith— faith that believes and hopes in You, “just because” You are God.

Most kids have the gift of catching songs so easily. It’s as if it’s effortless for them. They hear a song, then they start singing it. The melody and lyrics come to them– just like that.

As with any other “talent”, this gift of absorbing music can either be a good thing, or a scary realization. On one hand, music can be used to educate our kids— teaching them many different concepts and words, and they would remember them. The words and ideas are automatically stored in their brains. On the other hand, they can also easily absorb ideas that we would rather not have them remember, or even hear about– mostly through songs.

The past few weeks, the girls have been singing three very popular songs. They hear it practically everywhere they go, so I really have no way of shielding them from these songs (perhaps ear plugs would work, but I can imagine the struggle that has to take place before I can pull off this strategy). Bruno Mars’ “Just The Way You Are“, Taylor Swifts’ …..many songs (so it’s not just three!), and Katy Perry’s “Firework“, are the mainstays here in our household. Fortunately, they haven’t really learned the lyrics completely and have been making up most of the parts, but I know it’s just matter of time before they learn to get the lyrics right. By then, I want to make sure they have the ability to “screen” the words of the songs they’ll be hearing, before they start accepting any of them as truth.

Let me use the two songs Just the Way You Are and Firework as examples. Why, oh, why, are these songs so popular?? Simply because they use  words we all wish to hear about ourselves:

I am amazing!                             I am wonderful!                                 I am doing a great job!

I have what it takes!                                   I am made made for greatness!

I am a butterfly waiting to burst out of my cocoon! (That sounded better in my head)

...I am…!!! Wow!!…. I am….!!!

These thoughts do something in us, they stir us up. All the more for our kids. Just leave them with paper and crayons and you see how much their ears are itching to hear these “stir up” words– “Mom! Look! Did I do a good job??” “Dad! Look! Am I good??” ….And as dutiful, loving parents, what do we tell them?? “WOW! Amazing!” “Wow! You are so good!” I’m not saying that this is bad. Of course it’s our job to encourage them and help build their self-esteem! BUT as we go along in encouraging them, let us not forget to teach them two truths: First, apart from Christ, we are nothing; Apart from the grace of God, we can never be amazing. Second, we are enabled and empowered to do great things, not for ourselves. Being amazing is not the end goal. The end goal is to glorify God; to mirror His awesome greatness, His amazing grace.

As we were having dinner the other night, Alyanna and Mika once again started to sing that amazing song. I asked them, “What do you think of that song? Do you think it’s right in saying that you are amazing, just the way you are??” I was surprised to hear Alyanna’s response: “Mom, none of us is amazing. Because all of us have sin, all of us cannot be amazing (wrong phrasing, I know. But I’m writing it the way she said it!) But because Jesus died on the cross for us, then now we can be amazing! Because God is amazing!!”

I say this five-year old little girl nailed it.

I was having dinner with my cousins a few nights ago and one of them mentioned a term that was new to me — tiangge advice.

Wha–?? Huh??

Tiangge advice– according to my cousin’s definition, this pertains to advice we often hear that seem so profound and well thought of, yet if you really think about it, are actually worthless. It’s the term for the kind of advice that people just give for the sake of having something to say, or perhaps for the sake of sounding like they do have something good to say. One would think that he/she has just received some valuable insight, when in actuality, what he/she got was far from having real value. Sadly, this is the kind that we usually receive from most of our well-meaning friends and relatives. Even sadder is most of the time, we just realize that they are not really sound advice only after we have followed them and gotten hurt from doing so.

The reality is that we live in a world that is sold out on tiangge advice.

“Just follow your heart.”

“The heart knows not where it wants to go, but in the end it will lead you to where you need to go.” (haha! I just totally made this up! So tiangge!)

“Kung nagkasala ka na rin, panindigan mo na. Tuloy mo na. Anjan na eh.”

“When love is not madness, it is not love.”

“As long as you’re not hurting anyone, it’s okay to do as you please…”

“Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it is better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.”

These all sound wise and deep, and sometimes even noble. But the last time I checked, the world is full of hurting people who followed these words of wisdom.

I have to admit, these tiangge advice are really phrased well. I can’t blame the people who end up following them. I mean, if I hadn’t known any better, I myself would not just be following, but I’d be giving out the same kind of advice! This makes me scared… What about my kids?? what kind of advice will they be hearing and receiving years from now? Ukay advice?? The idea of this happening is not so unlikely you know, and when that happens, what then?? Will my kids be ready to discern what is right and what is wrong? Will they be able to tell the difference from what sounds right and what sounds good from what is right and what is good? Will they be able to give a counter-offer of real quality, valuable, and time-tested advice?

I hope so. I pray to God that they will be able to.

One thing we can count on is that that kind of wisdom and discernment wouldn’t come from thin air. Nor will it come from some built-in intuition, and especially not from the world that’s surrounding them (we’ve established that the world is full of tiangge advice right??). No, if we want our children to have the wisdom and the ability to discern and even give sound advice, we have to be deliberate in teaching them Biblical advice. We have to make the effort to teach them what the Bible has to say about all the many different issues they face or will face. They have to know that the Bible is the final authority in all matters of life. They have to understand how God’s Word translates to their daily concerns, and appreciate how relevant it is in their lives.

“Do not let this book of the law depart from your mouth. Meditate on it meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful….” Joshua 1:8

“Teach to your children , talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up…” Deuteronomy 11:19

“Your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path…” Psalm 119:105

“All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness…” 2 Timothy 3:16

If we are faithful to do this, then once our children start hearing tiangge advice, they would know better. They won’t just buy in to whatever is being handed to them. More than that, they’d be ready to offer the kind of advice that the world really needs to hear.

“The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure.Who can understand it?” Jeremiah 17:9

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Prov. 4:23

“All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ, and gave us the ministry of reconciliation…” 2 Cor. 5:18

“You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.” 1 Cor. 6:19-20

“Finally, brothers and sisters, rejoice! Strive for full restoration, encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and peace will be with you.” 2 Cor. 13:11