It’s seven-thirty in the morning as I am writing this, and I haven’t had any sleep yet. I am now here in the ER of St. Luke’s Medical Center, waiting for the attending doctor to sign Mika’s discharge orders. I requested for them to allow us to go home first, since Mika already fell asleep and there’s not much that they can do for now but to observe her. That’s really all they can tell us for now— “Let’s observe her.”, and that’s precisely what we have been doing since we got here.

At this time, Dennis is seated beside me, asleep (or at least trying very hard to be able to). Mika, too, is sleeping soundly on the bed they have here. Alyanna, on the other hand, well….Alyanna is there in our house sleeping by herself. I am praying she doesn’t wake up until we are back home.

Oh, I forget. I haven’t even told you yet why we are here.

I don’t really know how to describe the events leading up to the time when we had to bring our second daughter Mika to the ER, because there really hasn’t been any “symptom”, as you would call it, that seemed significant enough on its own. I guess I could start from early this week (Tuesday), when Mika all of a sudden lost her appetite. If you have seen Mika eat, you would know that she really eats. She enjoys eating. She got that from m-…uh…DENNIS. Since Tuesday she would refuse to eat proper meals and would always ask for water. I attributed the sudden loss of appetite to probably teething (molars), and the thirst to the heat. No cause of alarm there. Then came Wednesday morning. After breakfast as Mika was walking all of a sudden she vomited a lot of what seemed like her entire breakfast meal. This happened four times, consecutively, so I’m not sure whether to count it as four or as one event, but at that time I considered it as one so I didn’t think it was a cause of concern either. That day, there was still no change in appetite. She then took a nap from 2-6:30 pm. She slept late the previous night, so it made sense for me to think it was because of that.

Thursday came, and I had to leave her over at my in-laws house for the day. They said she didn’t eat much except for a few spoonfuls of rice and some crackers. They’ve seen how she normally eats so they pretty much had a good point of comparison. They also noted that she had no energy the whole day, and that she has lost a lot of weight (they last saw her Sunday). I only saw her that night but already I could agree with them. I also noticed that she had loose stools when I changed her diaper in the morning and that night. Thursday night I thought I should be observing her health more closely.

Yesterday, it was better. She ate more than she has for the past few days, though still not as much as before. All she ate for the day were pasta, rice, some bread, and potato. No meat, no veggies– she refused them. Her stools were very watery and grayish, and quite frequent. (By this time, I already decided to take her for a checkup the next day).

Two AM this morning, Mika all of a sudden vomited out everything she ate since lunch—the rice, pasta, potato, bread….all came out. She had a hard time breathing since they were all still in their undigested form, meaning, how they came in through her mouth was exactly how they looked like as they came out. It was not even watery. It was a good thing that she threw up at the exact moment that Dennis woke me up and asked me to move so he could have more space. I knew it was God who woke both of us up, or else Mika might have had difficulty breathing in her sleep and she wouldn’t have known it. She then made poopoo twice within 30 minutes after her vomiting episode.

We decided to bring her to the ER.

So here we are. Forgive me for having to give you the details of her whole week. I think I’m writing this more for my sake, so in case there’s a need to recount the progression of symptoms, it’s all here. Thank you anyway, for sticking with me up until this point.

Later today, Dennis will be preaching at two of our services at the Fort. We have no nanny. We have two events that we’re supposed to go to. What I’m saying is a good night’s sleep is something that both of us could really use today.

That didn’t happen, so now what do I do?

I do not have much control over what will be taking place the rest of the day. I do not have much control over Mika’s condition. I do, however, have control over how I am going to respond. I could use the lack of sleep as an excuse to be all jumpy and cranky; I could use the stress as a reason to snap at my husband and my children. I could, but I choose not to.

Today, I choose to have joy. I choose to rejoice in the fact that no matter what happens, my God is faithful and sovereign. The God who holds my family knows what He’s doing. I can rest secure in the fact that my God loves me and my family…and that’s just the beauty of it— despite not having any sleep, I can rest. I can rest because my God is on His throne, and He’s watching over me.

“Water please!”

I never thought the day would come that Mika would actually be begging me for water, but it has! I owe it all to the summer heat.

This morning I was reading my Bible when I saw Mika getting out of our bed and walking towards the table where we had their cups and a pitcher of water. Of course, she wouldn’t have been able to lift such a huge pitcher, so I am so glad one of the cups were actually filled with water. She quietly looked at the cute-colored cups, hoping to get one that had water in it, and when she found the orange cup with water, she drank away…this whole time not minding that I was out of bed and seated by our window. Usually, when she wakes up seeing that I’m not beside her, she calls for me. Not this time— she just wanted to drink, and after she finished her water, she wobbled her way back to bed and went back to sleep.

Two hours later, here they are, still asleep. Just a few minutes ago, Mika started talking in her sleep. I kept trying to figure out what it was… “Ten I haf wo-tuh please?”… I went to watch her, trying to see if she was really asking for something or was this part of a dream she’s having. I leaned closer….and saw that she opened her eyes a little bit. As soon as she saw me, she started asking in a more demanding tone, almost about to cry “Wo-tuh please! Wo-tuh…please!” And she started gesturing with her hand. I then understood that this little girl was really thirsty and needed some water.

As I propped her up for her to be able to drink her water, sleepy as she was, I was reminded of some conversations I’ve had with people who were telling me how they’re “feeling dry” in their walk with God. I sometimes come across old friends who used to have so much zeal for the Lord and now all they say is, “Nawala eh.”, and they’d start to tell me how they don’t know what had happened, but their passion just ran out and their journey all of a sudden became dry. Until now, I hear this from friends who seriously love the Lord and want to know Him more, but are struggling because they simply feel…nothing. They feel that it is a season of drought for them and their faith.

Here is a fact of life: we will not always be on the mountaintop, all high and hyped up in our faith. There will really be times when God will take us down to the valley, sometimes to the desert…where our faith will really not feel as vibrant and full of life. There are two things that can happen when we get to this point: either we allow ourselves to completely dry up OR we thirst and make an extra effort every time to drink in more of God’s presence and His Word. We either completely DEhydrate or we can choose to get up, wobble if you may, and REhydrate. Sometimes we might have to reach the point of crying out as we ask for more of God’s presence, but we do it anyway….until we get that drink that we so desperately need.

We cannot choose where God would place us. We cannot always control where the seasons of life would take us. We do, however, get to choose our responses and how we grow in each season. If you’re in the season of plenty, good for you. Praise God for that! Keep on flourishing! But if you’re in the season of drought, rejoice and praise God still! Keep on, anyway! Keep on asking God to fill and refill you until you’re once again flourishing and thriving. Remember, you lose not when you feel dried up. You lose only when you stop seeking and thirsting for Him.

I have had this craving for caramelized onions for almost a month now. Lately I came up with this…i don’t know….I don’t even call it a recipe, but since it does involve food preparation, let’s just call it that for now.

I came up with this “recipe” to satisfy my weird onion craving..

- Slice white onions into rings. Season with pepper. Set aside.

- Measure about a half-cup of whole-wheat flour (may be bought at Healthy Options), you actually don’t need a lot, just enough to coat the onions

- Add a pinch of paprika and some cayenne pepper to the flour (both of these would have to be suited to your taste, how spicy you would like it to be) As for me, i like it HOT so that means more cayenne pepper

- Coat the onions with the prepared flour

- Using EV olive oil, saute the onions

…I’ve been snacking on these and adding these onions to my salad, sandwiches…practically everything! *sigh* I wonder when I’ll get over them… ???

Interestingly, here are some sites I found that support this craving of mine:

http://www.cayennepepper.info/health-benefits-of-cayenne-pepper.html

http://homecooking.about.com/od/foodhealthinformation/a/paprikahealth.htm

http://www.vegetarian-nutrition.info/updates/onions.php

http://www.whfoods.com/genpage.php?tname=foodspice&dbid=66

http://www.healingdaily.com/detoxification-diet/olive-oil.htm

yaaay!   Justified!

My father-in-law came to visit us earlier today. Alyanna does love him, but for some odd reason, she just isn’t warm and sweet to him…not like how she is with my mother-in-law, at least. Anyway, as I was coming down the stairs, I overheard my father-in-law persuading her to give him a kiss. When I got to our living room, I took it upon myself to help him persuade Alyanna into obliging him with a kiss…or a hug, at the very least. I took her aside, and after a few minutes, she finally gave in and agreed to give him a hug….but she insisted that I hold her hand while she did it. I went with her, and she slooowwly walked up to her grandpa and stood there in front of him, her body somewhat inclined towards him as if it was saying “If you want a hug from me, then YOU come and get it from me.” I think my dad-in-law got the message and knew it was the closest thing he could get to a hug from her so he happily took her in his arms and hugged her– Alyanna remained still and somewhat stiff (the “shy” kind of stiff, not the scared or indifferent kind). What came after took me by surprise and just made me laugh…

GRANDPA: *Hugging her tight and cherishing the rare moment* “Alyanna, you’re so fat fat na ah!” *rubbing the sides of her tummy, perhaps implying that her tummy was getting bigger*

ALYANNA: *Quickly forced herself out of those loving arms and hands* “No! I’m not fat!!”

GRANDPA: “Yes, you’re fat na, see your tummy? very big already!”

ALYANNA: *Now very disheartened by the comment, swiftly moved away from her grandpa and sat on our coffee table with both arms covering her tummy, frowning* “No! I’m not fat. I eat healFY (healthy) food! I always eat healfy food I can’t be fat! I’m not fat. You’re fat, not me!”

…At this point I knew I had to intervene….

ME: “No, Alyanna, what Ankong meant was that you’ve gained weight since the last time he saw you, but of course, you’re still not fat….You just got bigger because you’re a growing girl remember?”

ALYANNA: *Walks away from the table and moves to the other couch, still frowning*

GRANDPA: “Yes! Alyanna, you’re not fat! you’re still thin, but you’re fatter…but you’re still thin..just fatter….but thin!”

ME: “Remember? Before, you just weighed 20 pounds..now, you’re 30 pounds already! You’re bigger! But not fatter….because you always eat healthy food right?”

ALYANNA: *Feeling better now* “Yes.”

*She now smiles…and she starts pretending to be a baby and talking like a baby*

….I would understand why she reacted this way if her parents (that’s me and Dennis!) were the type who cared a lot about not getting fat….but obviously, we’re NOT! So I wonder, where’d she get this sudden body image issue??? I thought this was an adolescent thing…She hasn’t even turned four yet! Oh, dear…

When your child has a temperature, here are some helpful hints on treating it naturally:

• The most important thing is to make sure that she does not get dehydrated, since the sweating and runny nose that often accompany a fever can deplete her body of fluids. Give your child a cup of tepid diluted apple juice every hour, and if she is a reluctant drinker pop a straw in, which will encourage her (hopefully).
• If your child is not hungry, don’t insist that she eats. Energy taken up digesting food is energy channeled away from the healing process. Make plenty of fresh raw juices. Juices rehydrate your child’s body, supply plenty of antioxidants and encourage the elimination of unwanted toxins. Most children love fresh raw juices, and these are all that is needed to see them through acute illness.
• Tepid sponging can be very effective at bringing down a fever naturally. For some who don’t like this, a tummy compress can be an effective fever controller and detoxifier. The important thing is not to let your child get cold. If your child is resistant to the above strategies, don’t insist. Just keep her nice and cool and wipe her forehead with a cool flannel when needed.

** my notes from the book Boost Your Child’s Immune System by Lucy Burney.

More to come.