I’m back! 🙂 Yay!
Dennis and I just came back from the National Singles Getaway in Dubai. What a refreshing time to be able to meet and minister to the men and women from our different locations in UAE.
Last week was a milestone for me, as it was my first time to leave Isaiah, and my first time to leave the girls for more than three nights. For the first time (getting redundant now), Dennis and I left all three of them— and we were away for seven nights. SEVEN. That’s major for me.
Prior to leaving, I wanted to cry each time I thought about leaving them (actually, I did cry a couple of times). I worried about whether or not Isaiah would cry and not stop crying in the middle of the night. I worried about my stored breastmilk not being enough. I worried about the girls fighting. I worried about one of the kids getting sick. I worried about accidents happening. I worried about them missing me too much and crying (so feeling of me! hehe). I worried about me missing them too much and crying. I was worried about a lot of things, but of course I never really admitted this. All I would disclose is me not wanting to leave the kids, period. And that was true. But if I really thought about it, it was mostly fear and worry that made me not want to leave them.
A week before leaving, I knew I had to start preparing. I had to pack for our trip. I had to make lesson plans and prepare homeschool work for the kids to do while we’re away. I had to finalize my talk for the retreat. Most of all, I had to prepare my heart to be at peace with the thought of me leaving the kids for a whole week. I needed to pray for that to happen. This trip was to be a time of meeting new people. This trip was to be a time of seeing and enjoying another part of the world. This trip was to be a time of bonding for Dennis and I. This trip was to be a time to enjoy.
I asked God to deal with my heart. I knew that worry and fear are not from Him. I told Him I wanted to enjoy the trip and actually look forward to it.
I actually felt God looking at me with this “What are you so worried about, my dear daughter?” face, telling me “Am I not the one who is calling you and sending you there? Do you think I forgot to consider the fact that you would have to leave your kids?”.
That was it. That was enough for me. That was the end of my worrying.
I was going to enjoy our trip. I was going to focus on ministering to the women there. I was going where God was sending us willingly and joyfully (I know, I talk like we were going on a mission trip for a year or more!).
Our trip and stay in Dubai deserves a separate post, simply because of all the beautiful places, stories, and people I got to see and spend time with when we were there. For now, I will just fast forward to me coming back home (now).
The moment we got home, I started bombarding the girls and those I asked to spend time with them while we were away about how the kids were. Did they eat well? Did they sleep early (at least earlier than midnight– I know how they are when they have guests over)? Did they get along well? Did they obey? Were they responsible with their work? Did they finish the work I left for them to do? What about the baby? Did he miss me too much?
You get the picture.
Ang kulit ko.
To my surprise, they actually reported that for the first time ever (I think I’m exaggerating, and that I just have this “For the First Time in Forever…” Frozen song stuck in my head), the girls did not fight at all for the whole week! And they finished ALL the work they had to do all on their own! And they really said “we’re not allowed to eat sweets while mom and dad are away” when my sister-in-law brought home doughnuts! And they also said “we’re not allowed to watch that while mom and dad are away” when they had friends over! And Isaiah never woke up in the middle of the night looking for me! And He never cried prior to sleeping or upon waking up because he missed me! And I still have extra stored milk left in the freezer!
In short, they were more than just fine when we were away, they were GREAT! 🙂
And again, “Was I not the one who called you and sent you there? Did I not consider your kids when I gave you that assignment?”
Yes, you did, Lord.
So many times, it is so easy for us to retreat from whatever it is God calls us to simply because of worry and fear. It is easy for us to forget the fact that when God calls, He also covers. He’s got us covered. The goal is not just to complete whatever assignment He gives us, but to be able to have joy in the process, TRUSTING that all is well because of who has assigned us.
This is what I want to leave you with for now: All is well. He’s got it covered.
Now, do that thing He’s told you to do. Go where He’s called you to go.
And BE ALL THERE. 🙂